Little Women - Chapter 42

It was easy to promise self-abnegation when self was wrapped up in another, and heart and soul were purified by a sweet example. But when the helpful voice was silent, the daily lesson over, the beloved presence gone, and nothing remained but loneliness and grief, then Jo found her promise very hard to keep. How could she 'comfort Father and Mother' when her own heart ached with a ceaseless longing ¹ for her sister, how could she 'make the house cheerful' when all its light and warmth and beauty seemed to have deserted ² it when Beth left the old home for the new, and where in all the world could she 'find some useful, happy work to do', that would take the place of the loving service which had been its own reward? She tried in a blind, hopeless way to do her duty, secretly rebelling against it all the while, for it seemed unjust that her few joys should be lessened ³, her burdens made heavier, and life get harder and harder as she toiled ⁴ along. Some people seemed to get all sunshine, and some all shadow. It was not fair, for she tried more than Amy to be good, but never got any reward, only disappointment, trouble and hard work., ,Poor Jo, these were dark days to her, for something like despair came over her when she thought of spending all her life in that quiet house, devoted ⁵ to humdrum ⁶ cares, a few small pleasures, and the duty that never seemed to grow any easier. "I can't do it. I wasn't meant for a life like this, and I know I shall break away and do something desperate if somebody doesn't come and help me," she said to herself, when her first efforts failed and she fell into the moody ⁷, miserable ⁸ state of mind which often comes when strong wills have to yield to the inevitable ⁹., ,But someone did come and help her, though Jo did not recognize her good angels at once because they wore familiar shapes and used the simple spells best fitted to poor humanity. Often she started up at night, thinking Beth called her, and when the sight of the little empty bed made her cry with the bitter cry of unsubmissive sorrow, "Oh, Beth, come back! Come back!" she did not stretch out her yearning ¹⁰ arms in vain. For, as quick to hear her sobbing ¹¹ as she had been to hear her sister's faintest whisper, her mother came to comfort her, not with words only, but the patient tenderness that soothes ¹² by a touch, tears that were mute reminders ¹³ of a greater grief than Jo's, and broken whispers, more eloquent ¹⁴ than prayers, because hopeful resignation went hand-in-hand with natural sorrow. Sacred moments, when heart talked to heart in the silence of the night, turning affliction to a blessing ¹⁵, which chastened grief and strengthned love. Feeling this, Jo's burden seemed easier to bear, duty grew sweeter, and life looked more endurable, seen from the safe shelter of her mother's arms., , ,"My dear, nothing can comfort me like this," he answered, with a falter ¹⁸ in his voice, and both arms round her, as if he too, needed help, and did not fear to ask for it., ,Then, sitting in Beth's little chair close beside him, Jo told her troubles, the resentful sorrow for her loss, the fruitless efforts that discouraged her, the want of faith that made life look so dark, and all the sad bewilderment which we call despair. She gave him entire confidence, he gave her the help she needed, and both found consolation ¹⁹ in the act. For the time had come when they could talk together not only as father and daughter, but as man and woman, able and glad to serve each other with mutual ²⁰ sympathy as well as mutual love. Happy, thoughtful times there in the old study which Jo called 'the church of one member', and from which she came with fresh courage, recovered cheerfulness, and a more submissive spirit. For the parents who had taught one child to meet death without fear, were trying now to teach another to accept life without despondency or distrust, and to use its beautiful opportunities with gratitude ²¹ and power., ,His heart burned with longing for revenge.他心中燃烧着急欲复仇的怒火。,The deserted village was filled with a deathly silence.这个荒废的村庄死一般的寂静 。